Pleasantly surprised

It’s not always visible when someone is struggling with what they’ve done. Or when they’re nervous to return to society. Especially in prison, they won’t really show it. But when the moment approaches that a convict goes on parole or is released from prison, restorative mediation can make a valuable contribution. Especially when someone is going back to the place they used to live, where the crime took place. A coincidental meeting with the other person involved could suddenly get out of hand (again). 

Frans is in Leeuwarden prison for assault and making threats. He’ll be getting out soon. Not that long ago, he spoke to a mediator from Perspectief at a reintegration market. He took a folder, which skimmed once. Could this be something for him? He’s not looking forward to running into the person that he assaulted at the time. He doesn’t want any more trouble, and realizes that he had gone too far. 

Case manager

His case manager in the prison talked to him about restorative mediation before. At that point, he didn’t think it was for him, but with his release date coming up, he starts to think it might not be a bad idea. When Frans is visited by the aftercare coordinator of his municipality, he mentions it. The coordinator is familiar with Perspectief through a presentation at the Safety House (Veiligheidshuis) and applies for Frans through the organization’s website. With Frans’ permission, he transfers the case back to his case manager after the application, considering the guidance and aftercare he will receive afterwards.

A bit scary

Two weeks after the application, a mediator from Perspectief visits the prison. During the visit, she explains more about what restorative mediation is and talks with Frans about why he wants to get in contact with the other person. After this conversation, the mediator contacts the victim by sending a letter. After just a week and a half, Frans receives the message that the other person accepted. This is nice, but he also needs some time to let it sink in. Because it’s also a bit scary…

Vindictive

After careful preparation, for which the mediator meets with both people separately, a meeting takes place between Frans and Bert, the victim. They agreed through the mediator that they would shake hands when they walked in. Although the meeting doesn’t start off very smoothly, after a few minutes it starts to pick up. Bert explains that, although he’s also “not some kind of angel”, the assault definitely took a toll on him. He was angry for a long time, and sometimes also vindictive. Because of the assault he was out of the game for some time, and he felt depressed because of it.

Surprised

He was already doing better when he got the letter, and he was pleasantly surprised by Frans’ request to get in contact. “Just a bit more positively now.” The men laugh. It’s because of the nerves and also the astonishment that they are both sitting here now. Frans says that he really struggled with what he did. He knows he has a short temper, but his heart is in the right place. He’s happy that Bert took this effort, who tells Frans that it was a stupid move to make. Both of them recognize honestly and openly that this doesn’t mean it’s suddenly all hunky dory. “We’ll never be best friends.” But the men do agree that they will leave each other alone as much as possible and not to talk about it when the people in their area ask about it. 

Relieved

After the meeting, Frans is relieved. It wasn’t as bad as he thought it would be. Maybe he should have done it earlier, then he wouldn’t have struggled with it for so long. But that’s hindsight. A weight literally got lifted off his chest. And the prospect of walking around his village feels a lot better now. The mediator finishes the case and discusses it with the case manager. In the report she writes: the gentlemen did not become friends, but they promised to leave each other alone. 

For privacy reasons, the names of the participants are not real. The prison location is also fictitious.