I received a letter from Perspectief, what now?

Perspectief Herstelbemiddeling is an independent organization. We guide and facilitate contact between people who were involved in a crime or traumatic event, if they both want this. The goal is emotional recovery and processing what happened by talking about it with each other. Do you want more information about restorative mediation? On our website you can get to know more about what restorative mediation is and how it works. You can also read experience stories from participants to get a better idea of it.

I feel like I am being accused of something

We understand that it can be difficult to receive a letter from us, especially if you feel like you are being accused of something by the person who is asking to get in contact with you. First off, it’s important to know that Perspectief Herstelbemiddeling is not a part of the police or criminal justice system, and we do not pass on any information to them. The goal of restorative mediation is emotional recovery and processing what happened. Figuring out what the facts are and whether a crime has occurred, is not a part of the process. It’s possible that the other person has a different experience about what happened, and wants to discuss this with you under the guidance of a mediator. If you agree with the request for contact, this does not mean that you automatically ‘admit’ that you did something wrong or criminal.

It's also possible that you don’t know what the request is about. This is not always specifically mentioned in the letter, because it’s often a sensitive or difficult topic that is better to discuss over the phone or face-to-face. You can contact the mediator that sent you the letter, or our registration point, to ask for more information and to discuss the request for contact. The mediator can discuss with you whether you would like to get in contact, and what you would want or not want to discuss with the other person. The mediator will also discuss with you what they can or cannot share with the other person from your conversation. And it’s also completely fine if you decide you don’t want to get in contact after your meeting with the mediator: participation in restorative mediation is always completely voluntary.

It’s important to know that our mediators are impartial. This means that they do not choose sides, and that they offer support to both parties. They make sure that the wants and needs of both parties are the central focus, that means yours too.
My perpetrator/offender/causer of an accident wants to get in contact with me

We understand that it can be difficult when you receive a request to get in contact through us from somebody who has harmed you, especially if you have a very unpleasant image of them. It’s important to know that if you respond to the request, this does not mean that you immediately get in contact with this person. You will first talk to the mediator, who will discuss with you why the other person wants to get in contact, whether you want to get in contact, and what you would like to discuss. The mediator will also discuss with you what they can or cannot share with the other person from your conversation. And it’s also completely fine if you decide you don’t want to get in contact after your meeting with the mediator: participation in restorative mediation is always completely voluntary.

If you have received a letter from us, this means that the mediator has already had a conversation with the other person, and that the mediator thinks it could be a good idea for you to get in contact with each other. Our mediators are trained professionals, and they often work with perpetrators/offenders/causers of an accident, which means they have a good ability to tell what their intentions are. If you are not sure whether you want to get in contact, you can call the mediator who sent you the letter, or our registration point. The mediator can tell you more about why the other person wants to get in contact, and can discuss with you in detail whether you want this too. It’s important to know that our mediators are impartial. This means that they do not choose sides, and that they offer support to both parties. They make sure that the wants and needs of both parties are the central focus, that means yours too.
My victim wants to get in contact with me

We understand that it can be difficult when you receive a request to get in contact through us from your victim, especially if you struggle with feelings of guilt, for example. First off, it’s important to know that Perspectief Herstelbemiddeling is not a part of police or the criminal justice system, and we do not pass on any information to them, even if there is an ongoing court case or a court case still has to take place. The goal of restorative mediation is emotional recovery and processing what happened. Figuring out what the facts are and whether a crime has occurred, is not a part of the process. Our mediators are impartial. This means that they do not choose sides, and that they offer support to both parties. They make sure that the wants and needs of both parties are the central focus, that means yours too.

It's possible that in your experience, you haven’t made any victims, for example because you stole something when nobody was there to see it, or broke into a house when the owners weren’t at home. But it’s possible that the other person experienced this differently, and might want to talk to you about it or ask questions. If they know more about how it happened, this can give them more peace of mind. It can also be a relief for you to get in contact. You can tell your side of the story, and apologize, if you want.

If you are not sure whether you want to get in contact, you can call the mediator who sent you the letter, or our registration point. The mediator can tell you more about why the other person wants to get in contact, and can discuss with you in detail whether you want this too. You will only get in contact with the other person once you have talked to the mediator, and decide that this is what you want. And it’s also completely fine if you decide you don’t want to get in contact after your meeting with the mediator: participation in restorative mediation is always completely voluntary.