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Do you have questions or doubts, or would you like to discuss with someone whether restorative mediation is right for you?
Were you involved in a theft or fraud?
You stole something from someone - from someone you know, from a store, or from someone on the street. Or you took someone's money or possessions with a smart trick, like a payment request or an online sale. Or maybe something was taken from you. Someone stole something from you, or you were scammed through a text message, fake account or phishing link.
It may seem like something small, but it can have a big impact. A quick fix, and impulse, or something you regret. Or something you didn't see coming and that has affected your trust of other people. Whether you did something or something was done to you - these kinds of actions can stick with you. Maybe you feel guilty or ashamed. Or maybe you are angry, sad, or have many questions. About yourself, about the other person, about why it happened.
You could be asking yourself these questions:
- Why did they do it?
- What were the consequences?
- Why did this happen to me?
- Do they still trust me?
- Do they know what the impact has been for me?
- Is there a way to make things right?
- What if we run into each other again?
- What do they think about me now?
- Was I being naive?
- Do they regret what they did?
Restorative mediation can help
In restorative mediation, you get in contact with the other person(s) that were involved in the event. This contact is guided by one of our professional mediators. You can choose for yourself what you would like to ask or say to the other person. For example:
- Why you or the other person did it
- What the consequences were for you
- How the other person experienced it
- How you would like to move on
It can help to talk about what happened, to say how you feel about it, and get answers from the other person. This can help you feel more calm, less angry, less scared, or less guilty. It can help to process the event and come to terms with it. You can also talk about how you will move on, for example in case you know each other or live in the same neighborhood. You could, for example, agree that you will only greet each other from a distance in the future.
You don't necessarily have to have a face-to-face conversation with the other person, if you don't want to. You can also write each other a letter, or send messages through the mediator. You can also record an audio or video message for the other person. You decide what kind of contact you want. Visit this page for more information about how it works.
Good to know:
- Restorative mediation is voluntary and free of cost.
- The contact is confidential.
- The mediator is neutral and prioritizes the wants and needs of both parties.
- All participants can start, pause, or quit the mediation at any point.
- You can bring someone to the meeting to support you.
- If you do not speak (good) Dutch or English, we can arrange an interpreter for you who will translate. This does not cost money for you.
Please note: we cannot help you with getting back your money or getting compensation. We can facilitate and guide a conversation with the goal of emotional recovery after what happened. If you want help getting back stolen money or getting compensation for damages, you can contact Victim Support Netherlands.
Apply
You can apply for restorative mediation on this page.
If you apply, this doesn't mean we will immediately contact the other person, or that you commit to getting in contact with them. We will first discuss with you why you want restorative mediation, and what is important to you. Only once you give permission, the mediator will contact the other person.
Experiences of others
The store robbery that Belinda experienced has had a great impact on her life ever since. It even led to physical issues. Now that she has had a conversation with the perpetrator, her life has changed a lot. “I’m very happy I did it. A lot of fear got lifted from my shoulders.”
At first, Evi didn’t want to invest any more energy into the robbery that happened at the drug store she had been a manager at for years. But then her motherly heart got in the mix. 'I hoped I could contribute to a better life for him.' She’s also happy for herself that she agreed to a mediation.
“Being a perpetrator doesn’t mean that person is completely evil. That’s true for me as well. I regret the robberies that I committed. I wanted to get in contact with the victims to tell them how I ended up in the criminal circuit.” Jordi (27) talks about his experience with restorative mediation.
Gwen was robbed in her home and threatened with a knife. After the perpetrator was arrested, Gwen got a call from a mediator from Perspectief. The perpetrator wanted to talk with her. Together with the mediator, Gwen visited him in the youth prison.
