“Trauma therapy was no longer needed after a meeting with the perpetrator”

When psychologist (POH-GGZ) Jacqueline Pulles heard about restorative mediation, she immediately thought: maybe this is something for Belinda. Belinda came to her with anxiety issues that, after a robbery 25 years ago, never went away. Jacqueline proposed restorative mediation: contact with the perpetrators of the robbery. 

Jacqueline Pulles has been working in psychiatry for almost 40 years. She currently works as a psychologist at a general practitioner’s office (POH-GGZ) and counselor/confidant regarding inappropriate conduct. At a theme day for counselors/confidants, she heard about Perspectief Herstelbemiddeling, an organization that organizes and facilitates contact between victims and offenders after a crime or traumatic event. 

In her work as a psychologists she meets people who struggle with and get stuck because of all sorts of issues, such as depression, addiction, or old age. She considers carefully where someone can get the best help they need in the form of coaching or treatment. Belinda came to her as well: “Belinda came to me with anxiety issues, struggled with work and other areas of her life, and also had physical ailments that possibly were exacerbated by her stress levels. She was scared to be in small spaces, so she preferred to avoid elevators and airplanes.”

Robbery

At their following consult, Belinda told Jacqueline about the robbery that happened 25 years ago while she was working in a supermarket. “She had never really been able to process the event. We started discussing a treatment plan. We considered EMDR, or a different type of fear- or trauma treatment. But when I heard about restorative mediation, I asked her whether she would want to get in contact with the perpetrators of the robbery. Together, we looked at the website of Perspectief Herstelbemiddeling, and she started thinking about it.”

After an intake with a mediator from Perspectief Herstelbemiddeling, the mediator contacted the perpetrators. One of the two perpetrators was willing to meet with Belinda. Jacqueline was present during the preparation talks with the mediator. “The mediator was very open and transparent about what Belinda could expect. Every aspect of the meeting was discussed in detail as well, such as who would enter the room first, and what they would do if they happened to run into each other in the street afterwards.”

Jacqueline was also present during the meeting with the perpetrator as a supportive figure. “The confrontation with the perpetrator went very well. Belinda played a big part in that. I got to know Belinda as a vulnerable woman who struggled with anxiety. Now she had chosen to take the stage. Just that contrast was very beautiful to witness.” 

Took back control

“For Belinda, those five minutes of fear during the robbery turned out to be a life event that she continued to suffer from. The perpetrator was surprised about this, and was open to listen to her when she talked about the effects the robbery had on her. During such an event, control is taken away from you. You have no power over the situation. Through having this meeting, she took back control. She was able to decide now. She was no longer a victim, but took the lead. Besides that, many of her questions were answered that therapy could have never answered for her. She realized: there was much less behind it than I feared. He showed remorse and had bettered himself and his life. She had a really good conversation and could ask all of her questions to him.”

“After the robbery, she was afraid to get into small spaces for years. The meeting with the perpetrator took place on the fifth floor. After the meeting, she got into the elevator with us. I barely noticed any anxiety in her anymore. That was the most special and nicest thing for me to see. I saw Belinda only one time after that during an aftercare meeting. She was doing very well and no longer needed any treatment from me. It was such a pick-me-up for her and such a success story. A very different approach, but so helpful!”