Restorative mediation is contact between people who were involved in an impactful event. This could be a crime, violence, sexually transgressive behavior, or a traffic accident. The contact takes place under the guidance of a professional mediator.
Talking to each other about what happened and what the impact has been can help to process the event and come to terms with it. How restorative mediation can help is different for everyone. Here you can find more information about how restorative mediation works and what it can do for you.
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Do you have questions or doubts, or would you like to discuss with someone whether restorative mediation is right for you?
“As a child, I couldn’t stand up for myself, and now I can.”
For a time during high school, Julia* (25) was tutored almost weekly. She realises now that the transgressive behaviour that the man, a family friend, showed towards her, was not okay. “I wanted to let him know how it had affected me, and how it still affects me.”
Read the experience story of Julia.
What happened?
Someone did something sexual to you that you didn't want. Or maybe you crossed someone else's boundaries. Maybe it happened online, while going out, or within a relationship. For example, an unwanted message, inappropriate touch, or rape.
A nude picture or video was leaked. Maybe it happened to you, or maybe you forwarded someone else's. It may have seemed funny or innocent at first, but now it feels different. Read more about how restorative mediation can help.
Someone threatened or intimidated you. Or maybe you did it to someone else. With words, a weapon or a gesture. Online, offline, or both. Sometimes it happens impulsively, sometimes out of anger or fear.
Something was stolen from you, or you lost money through a smart trick. Or maybe you did this to someone else. It may seem insignificant, but it can have a big impact. What started as an easy profit, can have a lot of consequences. For you and for the other person.
You were involved in a traffic accident - as a victim, relative, the person who caused it, or a witness. Whether it happened recently or a long time ago, an accident can have a big impact. Contact can help with recovery.
How does it work?
Perspectief Herstelbemiddeling guides and facilitates contact between people who were involved in a traumatic event. This could be a crime, a (traffic) accident, sexual violence, or for example transgressions in sports. We call this restorative mediation.
Once you apply, one of our professional mediators will start working to carefully prepare the contact. Besides a meeting, you can also choose to exchange letters or send messages through the mediator.
On this page you’ll find answers to questions people frequently ask about restorative mediation.
Experiences of others
Two weeks after his 15-year-old daughter was hit by a truck, Francel wanted to get in contact with the driver. “I heard he was on sick leave. I proposed to meet with him, we would both feel better after that.”
In 2021, Jolanda’s son Perry (21) was killed when his then 17-year-old friend Damian stabbed him in a parking lot. “For a long time, I had no idea what had gotten into him. Only once I got in contact with him, I got answers and peace,” Jolanda says, who talked with Damian and later also his parents.
When she was 43, Gaby had a conversation with her uncle, who sexually abused her when she was a child. “I wanted to hand the secret and the responsibility regarding all of this back to him, and with that take back my agency and my freedom."
Esther* (49) experienced sexually transgressive behavior when she was a student. She tucked the experience away and hid from it, but the memory of that night recently resurfaced. She decided she needed to do something about it, and applied at Perspectief to get in contact and talk with the other person about what happened.
For a time during high school, Julia* (25) was tutored almost weekly. She realises now that the transgressive behaviour that the man, a family friend, showed towards her, was not okay. “I wanted to let him know how it had affected me, and how it still affects me.”
Manon was 17 years old when she became a victim in a serious traffic accident and lost her foot. Three years after the accident, she met the truck driver who had caused the accident under the guidance of a mediator. “I immediately thought: this man never had bad intentions.”
